My Wait is a form of fear
My fear is triple-packed
for expediency of detination
Time release capsules
So I don't get bored
whilst I wait.
How far inverted can I get before someone slips
and speaks
Eyes glazed over
I could be looking at anything at all
Just give me a focal point and I can slide in
I ride freely
Better it is this way
than a word or two meant idle
Stare at my hands
for 46 human minutes
How long was that?
Still more time?
A zone is humming in my ears
A baby coos somewhere
I've lost footing so my feet go numb
I think
Strictly to myself.
Kill some time
My eyes were closed
a magazine on my lap and open.
Who would know I cannot read it with my eyes closed or open?
It gives me the immediacy I require
They only glimpse
I only imagine
That silence is so loud.
I gave up 12 times since we began
but I am still here
And all along they know,
I'll do it.
I keep refusing
But all keep waiting
all along
time corrupts the thirteenth minute
and now?
Next please!
no, not me.
I jump started premature
When I fall back in
Bright Red and beating
Clearly more deeply
Screaming at the backs of my eyelids
Why won't they respond?
Unhinged the ecstasy
of the dull-droms
Disconnected from the total
I make a buzz of all time
Condensed to my wait
How does anyone miss this?
So carefully blanched and painted blue
To amuse for the time you spend here
you bounce light-hearted
I pull my hair
By the time they call my name
I will have forgotten identity.
By the time I stand,
I will have lost me inside of me.